BOOK REVIEW: Fifty Shades of Grey

**just reposting from my Goodreads account. Didn't even remember writing a review for this one - that's a sign how much I tried to forget about this crap.

Well , well.. That was painful. And not in a good way. 

Author:  E.L. James
Country:  UK
Genre:  Erotic Romance, BDSM
# of pages:  514
Year Published:  2011

Holy cow, that was horrible writing! Thank God I'm done with this one!

My SUBCONSCIOUS is currently floating in a river - lifeless. Just wasn't able to take all the crap I force-fed her.

And my INNER GODDESS was wondering about how many shades of psychosis those characters really have. She sank into the plush sofa in my head and put her feet in the coffee table, grabbed her copy of Are You There Vodka, It's Me Chelsea and totally immersed herself to the silly but at least funny anecdotes in the book. But not before she rolled her eyes at me. Yeah. My snobbish, snappy inner goddess is not amused by this particular choice of book. Good thing Christian didn't see that eye-roll, or she would have kicked his controlling, stalker, psycho ass once he utters his usual "So help me god, Lucresia's Inner Goddess, I will take you over my knees and smack you hard with my twitchy palms." Now let's see who's the real Dom. -_-

Seriously, this is worse than Twilight.

So many times I wanted to give up & not finish it, but, I needed to know what it is that made this book so popular.

5 Reasons Why I Love THE SOUND OF MUSIC

"I go to the hills, when my heart is lonely... I know I will hear, what I've heard before... My heart will be blessed by the sound of music, and I'll sing once more."

Directed by:  Robert Wise
Starring:  Julie Andrews, Christopher Plummer
Screenplay by:  Ernest Lehman
Cinematography by:  Ted McCord
Editing by:  William H. Reynolds
Music by:  Richard Rodgers (music & lyrics)
Oscar Hammerstein II (lyrics)
Irwin Kostal (musical score)
Running time:  174 mins
Budget:  $8.2 million
Box-office:  more than $286 million

"The Sound of Music is credited as the film that saved 20th Century Fox, after extreme high production costs and financial losses incurred by Cleopatra (1963) that almost bankrupted the studio." - Wikipedia

Well, I credit The Sound of Music as the film that never fails to save me, after extreme stress and depressive episodes incurred by Life that almost always bankrupts my soul. There's something so happy with this film, that the moment I see Julie Andrews up in that mountain (or hill), all of my problems melt away. Maybe it's because this movie was a big part of my childhood and it reminded me of the time when I felt safe & without any real-life worries. It's a comforting, nostalgic trip.

Without further ado, here are five reasons why The Sound of Music still remains my all-time favorite movie.

BOOK REVIEW: Dracula The Un-Dead (The Authoritatively Disappointing Sequel to the Original Classic)

In a nutshell, we get to see how the band of heroes are living 25 years after their encounter with Count Dracula.

Written by:  Dacre Stoker & Ian Holt
Genre:  Horror novel
# of pages:  424
Country:  United States
Year Published:  2009

Sounds interesting, right?

Oh and it's written by Bram Stoker's great grand-nephew, Dacre Stoker! Are you really stoked now? I sure was!

They claim it's the true sequel to our beloved classic. An authoritative sequel in fact. I believed them. How gullible was I? 

Borrowing a quote from the book, Dracula The Un-Dead at its best is made up of only a few, special, scattered moments. I don't know which or how much Dacre or Ian wrote, so I can't pinpoint who is really to blame, but let me just mention (if you haven't googled them yet) that Dacre is a track & field coach, while Ian Holt has previously been a direct-to-DVD horror screenwriter who has been a fanatic of anything Dracula-related for a long time. You can bet a dollar or two who did most of the writing, and which one whose name served as a huge banner ad.

Veronica Mars (2014): And We Thought She Was Out

I'm a Marshmallow, and I'm an addict.

Directed by:  Rob Thomas
Screenplay by:  Rob Thomas, Diane Ruggiero
Music by:  Josh Kramon
Cinematography by:  Ben Kutchins
Editing by:  Daniel Gabbe
Running Time:  107 mins
Budget:  $6 million (Kickstarter)
Box Office:  over $2 million (already considered a success)

There are spoilers in this post, but rest assured you'll be warned.

It's been 7 years since the series ended, 9 years after the events of season 3. I never thought (imagined, yes) I would see this gang again. Hearing "We Used To Be Friends" sung by some street performer a few minutes into the film, goosebumps crawled all over me, and I can't help but scream "Oh my god, oh my god, the feels, the feeeeeelssssss!" repeatedly. That part alone makes the wait so worth it. 

Pure happiness, is what I'm feeling. I watched VM twice in one week.

So did this movie deliver?  

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

Considered one of the greatest films ever made in the silent era, and cited as having introduced the "twist ending" in cinema, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (which also has a 100% critics rating in Rotten Tomatoes) surely is a must-see for cinephiles & horror film lovers.

Directed by:  Robert Wiene
Written by:  Hans Janowitz, Carl Mayer
Music by:  Guiseppe Becce
Cinematography by:  Willy Hameister
Running Time:  71 mins
Country:  German

I started to watch this film without any idea what it's about. I didn't even know it was a silent movie. All I know is that it's a classic and is considered one of the best films ever. And man, it didn't disappoint! 

The first scene, I was a bit hesitant whether or not I was in the mood for that kind of film - but I did notice the unique quality of its cinematography. But the moment the little town was introduced, my attention was caught 100%. Tim Burton "feels". I love it!

the village of Holstenwall

The rare times that I watch a silent film, it's either I'm enchanted with the music, or the acting, or the story. This time, it's the visuals first and foremost that got me curious. Every single scene was like looking at an artwork in a museum. The distorted little houses or architecture makes you feel like you're staring at paintings of Salvador Dali or even Picasso, and the wonderful play of shadow and light (and the color, at times) sometimes reminds me of my favorite Caravaggio. Seriously, it's amazing. But after the feast I got from the artsy background/set & the wonderful colors or cinematography, the characters intrigued me. I rarely get creeped out just by looking at actors with over the top make up, but TCoDC obviously is the king of all creepy characters. The close-up shots, the play on shadows, the make-up which makes The Rocky Horror Picture Show seem tame,  and the jerky dance-like movements of the actors, really unsettles you and creeps you out. In short, everything about this movie has enraptured me!

(Back 2 Back) OLDBOY: Park Chan-wook VS. Spike Lee

Back 2 Back is my comparison review of an original film and its remake/s. 

In this post, I will be reviewing Park Chan-wook's Oldboy (2003), and Spike Lee's 2013 version.

 Loosely based on the Japanese manga, Old Boy, written by Nobuaki Minegishi & Garon Tsuchiya

      (2003) Directed by:  Park Chan-wook                                     (2013)  Directed by:  Spike Lee
       Starring: Choi Min-Sik, Yoo Ji-tae, Kang Hye-jung                         Starring: Josh Brolin, Sharlto Copley, Elizabeth Olsen
       Running Time:  120 mins                                                           Running Time:  104 mins                                                                      Budget:  $3 million                                                                      Budget:  $30 million
       Box Office:  almost $15 million                                                Box Office:  almost $5 million

Let me just say this first: NO I don't care that a remake of Oldboy has been done. I have stopped hating on remakes for awhile now. To those who keep on saying that it's a disgrace to the original blah blah (and I'm speaking generally here), that the original should never ever ever have been re-made etc. etc., all I can say is this: remakes, however unnecessary, are inevitable & to be expected. There will always be other attempts to re-create or surpass what we deem as an already great work of art. Why? Because humans are perfectionists.. or we just love to rip off stuff (and by we, I mean Hollywood). And while the remakes are usually sub-par & disappointing, to me, that's part of the fun. It only makes the original shine brighter, and those who haven't even heard of it in the first place might be curious enough to want to watch it - and isn't that a good thing? Lastly, a bad remake would never be a disgrace to the original because they are two separate films, made by different directors, with different casts - the only one disgraced or put in a bad light is the one who made the remake. So guys, chill!

Now let's talk about the movies.

I'll go straight to the point. There's no contest here, the 2003 version is a masterpiece, and obviously the superior film between the two. I'm pretty sure anyone who have seen both movies will agree and won't need any convincing. 

But just humor me, here are the reasons why the South Korean film is great, while the Hollywood remake is just average at best.